I’ve been at a crossroad the past few weeks. There were some decisions that I needed to make that would determine how and where I would spend my time and whether I’d need to move or not. Decisions, for me, the past few years have not been easy. Clarity has seemed fleeting and direction has felt nonexistent.

Have you ever gone through a season like this? Sure, there are times when we need simply just decide something. And there are individuals who are more accustomed to that than others – I’m not one of them. It was the character and nature of the Lord that I was getting hung up on. Let me explain.

There have been some risks I’ve taken in my life that have turned into some of the best things I’ve ever done. There are other places where I gave myself to that led to intense heartbreak and brokenness. Those experiences reeled me back to a place of not wanting to do anything unless I knew for a fact it was from God.

Sounds nice, doesn’t it? I have some tough news for both of us – that’s not really how God works. God is after obedience and trust as we go about our lives. The fog begins to roll in when we choose things contrary to where we knew we are being called. Disobedience is a quiet place. Distrusting God’s character certainly makes it hard for us to hear Him.

I was listening to The Wild at Heart podcast the other day. They talked about how it’s the deeper intentions and the truest things about God and us that are attacked and challenged most by the enemy. It’s the best things of life that have the greatest wars waged against them. Think of love. Love, when participated in correctly is one of if not the most beautiful and life-giving experiences one can step into, and so it’s no wonder that broken love is one of if not the most painful experiences to walk through.

The main struggle for me was whether God is actually for me. Because it had felt like He’d forgotten about me in a lot of ways. That podcast brought to mind a plaque hanging in the hallway of my parents’ house. It has each of our names written followed by their meaning. What I found interesting was that my name, Zachary, means “remembered by God.” This season has been an attack on the very thing I’m named after.

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever” (Hebrews 13:8). “The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God will stand forever” (Isaiah 40:8). God’s Word teaches us His character and nature. He is a faithful God who will never leave us or forsake us (Hebrews 13:5). I’m thankful to say that I have seen the provision of the Lord, and friend, He is a faithful God. But it was my very identity that had been under attack.  

What is it for you? Is there an attribute of the Lord you know to be true that just doesn’t seem to be so? I want to remind you of one thing: there is an enemy out there that does not want you to know the one true God, and he will do anything to twist your view of God. It’s the truest things about you that will come under the greatest attack. This is not something to be feared because the exhortation is that we would go to the source. Root yourself firmly in the Scriptures. It’s there that the true nature of God and who we are in light of Him is truly revealed.